I wasn’t able to get away from work long enough to eat a slow, mindful meal today. I tried to pay attention during a working lunch of naan dipped in some spicy vegetable curry, but it didn’t feel like what my body wanted, so I didn’t eat much, and by the time I finished my shift I was so hungry I was feeling faint and dizzy.
I cooked up a wonderful burrito with beans, cheese, lettuce, cilantro, and avocado–and tried to be mindful and resist the urge to wolf it down. I made myself pay attention to the mechanism of chewing, and oh my–the tongue is a very busy creature with a will of its own, collecting all the bits of food and positioning them on itself where the taste buds will get the maximum flavor explosion. I paused, and my mind wandered off. I thought about Hawaii and the volcano on the Big Island and the Hindu monastery on Kauai that I want to visit someday, and petroglyphs, and the long, cramped flight getting to the Islands, and plane tickets… I still had low blood sugar and couldn’t stop my mind from spinning off on a new tangent with every bite.
I washed the dishes, then I had a piece of Vietnamese sesame crepe and was finally able to pay attention to that as my blood sugar normalized and the dizziness subsided. It wasn’t quite the same as my usual zoning out, though; part of me stayed aware enough to observe the experience of being dizzy and unable to pay attention.